Saturday, May 8, 2010

jerking off?

This blog is dusty and full of cobwebs. It's been neglected. I should feel guilty, but I don't. The reason for feeling no guilt is simple: I've had nothing to write about. Looking back, most of my posts have focused on "how I've figured it all out." But that's bullsh*t.

I've been thinking that if I have nothing figured out,, ... then what is the point of posting anything at all? Posting other people's postings, or posting other people's videos, ... well, it's dumb, and ... it's like masturbating: nothing is accomplished but me getting my "intellectual rocks off," which is dumb and selfish ... and a futile exercise.

I've also posted things on your blog, ... although it's been a while. To stay honest, I must admit that the purpose of those posts was simply to get you to look at my posts. Again, dumb.

So, I'm done being dumb here. But it's not that I am done with "blogging" per se. Rather, I'm done with gratifying my ego for the sake of my ego. I'm done with pretending like I've figured something out that some audience "out there" is waiting to hear and read about, ... and by chance, comment on.

I've questions, not answers. I don't have it figured out. So this blog will, from now moving forward, be like an oil rig "drilling," ... or maybe more like a gold-panner "panning," ... or perhaps more like a telescope or microscope operator "looking," .... or like a cook "sniffing and tasting," or like some guy walking around the woods.

Here are the questions below, ... in no order of importance. Any answers are good answers, so long as they are honest.

How can we reconcile our intellectual and spiritual world-views?

Is evolution wrong?

Is creation wrong?

Is there some "magical middle-ground?"

How can we believe an impossible story?

Is He really jealous for me?

How can a man proclaim that He is The King and change the world?

How can we make sense of the Holy Spirit?

How can we experience the Holy Spirit in a world full of doubt?

If it is real, can we measure it?

Why do "good" people suffer?

Why do "bad" people seem to prosper?

How can I be "OK" with my mother dying?

What does it mean to "be saved?"

What and where is Heaven?

What is Hell?

What is the purpose of pain, ... and pleasure?

Are we biological entities with no ties to what believers call "the supernatural."

What is my purpose?

Do we have a purpose?

If it's not real, why is my life feel better by believing in a story greater than me?

Am I brainwashed?

To whom am I talking to when I talk with Jesus?

Am I talking to Jesus or God, or both, ... or the sky?

Is there "right" and "wrong?"

Or, is it all social construction?

Or, ... maybe postmodern sensemaking?

If God is real, then why can't we prove it empirically?

If god is not real, then why can't we prove it empirically?

Is my deceased Mother able to see me?

What does she think about me?

What is Love, and why do I believe that it Wins?

Where does that come from?

How should I worship?

How should I pray?

How should I give?

How should I live?

Why do I have so many questions?

What is guilt?

How do I deserve such a beautiful wife?

Where do my son's questions come from?

Why is my daughter the most beautiful creature that I've ever laid my eyes on?

Why would I move mountains for both Ethan and Riley?

Is the "thought" of Jesus a convenient lie?

Am I fooling myself?

Is this belief just a way to perpetuate "church?"

What are they really doing with my money?

Should I give less, ... or more.

Why?

Is God really good?

Or, is he really gone?

Has he ever been here?

And, why is he a Man?

Is it possible that God is a Woman?

Or, a is God a child?

How does time relate to space?

Why do people starve?

What's the purpose of weapons?

Why are we the only destructive string of life (when compared to ALL OTHER LIFE FORMS of life)?

Why are we so different from our closest biological/genetic cousins?

Why does man have the potential for destroying the world with nukes?

Why are whales and chimpanzees naturally "green," with no effort?

What makes us different?

What's it mean to be "broken?"

What's it mean to be "ransomed?"

Why do I believe that I am both?

Are we aliens?

Is God an alien?

Where does the universe start, ... and stop?

Does it?

Are there really multiple dimensions of existence?

How many dimensions can we see and experience?

How many are there to see and experience?

What's it mean to "hate," and where does that come from?

Should I make a difference?

Can I make a difference?

Can you make a difference?

Should we make a difference?

How?

Why?

When?

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